Sunday, December 12, 2010

窮惡

話說我做開我屋企附近果間facial執左,淨返果0的未做果0的treatment又唔肯退返$$$畀我,又唔俾我換產品,唯有焗去第2近果間銅鑼灣分店果度做埋佢。

今日第1次去,我都預左佢地會sell得好兇狠。事關我買落果0的package佢地完全係幫我齋做冇$$$賺,所以佢地係咁sell我加$$$轉過個「更加適合我」既package。(我家陣買果個係最cheap既treatment,1次3舊水;佢叫我補$$$轉果個要8舊幾水1次,我梗唔制) 我問佢可唔可以將我淨返果0的轉做貴0的果個,做得幾多次得幾多次,佢話唔得,最少要買廿次,起碼補多5000幾蚊。佢食屎啦。咁我同佢講話我冇$$$,唔轉喇,做返而家果個得喇。

入到去個姐姐1路幫我做facial一路繼續sell我轉個貴treatment,猛咁話果個0的效果更好,又話0的客皮膚仲差過我做左果個之後都靚哂。我猛咁話我冇$$$,唔轉喇。佢仲不斷咁話「我都係為妳好,我唔係sell妳,我都係真心想幫妳」。直到佢講到第6次「我真心想幫妳」既時候我終於頂佢唔順同佢講左以下呢段野︰

「姐姐,我知妳真心想幫我,我從來冇懷疑過妳既真心,亦都好感激妳既真心。但係妳明唔明,問題唔係在於妳真唔真心,而係在於我真係畀唔起$$$買果個貴treatment。鬼唔知貴0的0的料好0的效果好0的咩,但係我買唔起丫嘛。如果我買得起,我晨早買左啦,我就唔係買呢個最平既treatment啦。妳猛咁話真心幫我,就等於同第3世界國家果0的窮到冇野食既人講,『拿,我呢度有盒叉雞飯,3草野,拿,你咁瘦,真係要食多0的野,我都係真心想幫你,我真心覺得你要買我盒飯』。喂大佬呀,你要幫佢,1係你就畀盒飯佢,1係就畀$$$佢買盒飯,而唔係明知佢冇3草野畀妳,妳仲不停sell佢買盒飯呀。妳明唔明呀?」

講完之後,佢冇再出過聲,亦都冇再講「我真心想幫你」呢6個字。

原來窮真係會令人惡架喎,我都好驚訝自己竟然可以咁流暢又咁華麗咁串到個姐姐1棟都冇。老實講,我好內疚。

(同埋原來窮都會令人粗魯架喎—點解我會講「3草野」而唔係「30蚊」架?破壞哂我淑女形象 (驚))

臨走果陣我同佢講︰「對唔住,我頭先唔應該咁串。」

佢笑哂口咁話︰「傻啦,傻豬黎既,唔好咁講呀。我都係真心……講自己既意見乍。」佢差0的又講左「我真心想幫你」。笑撚左。:-)

*****

題外話,背景音樂果首ToNick既《Last Christmas》好正,0的歌詞尤其抵死。我好鍾意。大家不妨聽下。講完。:-)

6 comments:

熊貓王 said...

你講事實姐,犯法牙?

(另,三草野一盒肥叉飯,如果唔包野飲,又真係貴左 D,除非真係好好好好食啦)

brownie said...

面在砧板上,如果我係你,我唔敢咁寸咀的。

WEnDy said...

熊貓王︰

咁佢都係搵食姐,都冇犯法 :-)

WEnDy said...

Brownie:

妳呢句野,係我寫果篇《臉紅》(http://cloudrops.blogspot.com/2010/04/blog-post.html)既時候已經有人咁樣回應過。但係我就係童言無忌!

文少 said...

乜你有淑女形象ga咩﹖(閃)

WEnDy said...

文少︰

作屎呀?(怒)